FCC F's Up Again

What would we American's do without the watchful eye of our neighbors to the North? Thank God for the Canadian media! CNN was apparently too busy reporting BIG news of the day yesterday, missing the latest queen-sized F-up in the FCC debaucle.

First America was at arms over Howard Stern and his frequent stripper guests. Never mind the fact that his show surfed the radio waves for years, was carried on television, and that much of America flocked to theaters to see the movie version of his on-air exploits. Doesn't a hit radio show, book, and movie indicate America has given their seal of entertainment approval?

Then, we got all in a tizzy over Janet's... Well... titty! Men can scratch their balls on air during the Super Bowl and the Coors girls can shake their cans during the commercial breaks, but ONE slippery, sneaky, little rogue breast and all bets are off?!? Aww, hell!

This priority has since shifted and now we're squashing a real menace to our society: cartoon porn. Sure, it's soft-core. But we must stop this insanity now before it really eats away at the fiber of our culture! Cartoon ass will not be tolerated!! Just head to France or Switzerland if you insist on that kinky cartoon shit.

Next will be... what???

My best guess is below, in the form of a handy illustration to help you sort out this whole complicated mess. Feel free to print it and place in your wallet for quick reference. Enjoy!